Howz It Goin'?

I know I seem like I hate A LOT of things...

But I just figured out last night that I hate it when people ask me "How's it going?"... or "Howz it goin'?" (the latter has the cannot-make-it ang mo wannabe twang factored in).

It's just such a stupid question in itself... especially if it is an opening question!

Everytime someone asks me that question, I SERIOUSLY wonder - how is WHO/WHAT going WHERE??!!?
And so, that is what I have replied in return to people who ask me such an idiotic question.

I don't know what else I can answer, cos', LOOK! There had been no subject, no question whatsoever posed prior to that, which would have otherwise allowed me to understand what is the 'it' referred to in the question.

Which means to say, 'it' can refer to just about anything isn't it?

How am I supposed to know if you are referring to the fats on my thighs? The ex-pimple on my face? My pet terrapins who were given away 3 years ago? My niece's new imaginary friend? My mom's permanent headache? Or my bro's on-going promiscuity?

Huh? Huh?? Huh???

The next time anyone asks me Howz It Goin', I think I would try replying excitedly: "Oh, IT multiplied!!" Then let the idiot feel confused while I smile back. Then wait till the cockbrain asks me what I am talking about, before I come up with another guai lan reply, depending on my mood and remaining patience.

Or, I can start forming tears in my eyes (which is not terribly difficult cos I am the sort who can cry anytime, anywhere, reason or without), give a forlorn dazed look, wait for 5 secs, and say: "It... it... it... crawled under my bed, got stuck there without my knowledge, and died! *add sobs and flowing tears at this point* I... I only found it 2 days later when it started giving away a bad smell..."

Not like that makes any sense of course. But then, neither did the question in the first place isn't it?

Alternatively, I may roll my eyes of course. It's probably a matter of time before I roll them at the person who asked me such a lack-of-effort question anyway.

But, an ultimate loserly question that goes along the likes of "YOzz... Howz it goin' mannnn?" should allow me to throw a punch into the loser's face. Maybe that would help to get his big ideas rearranged.